WTF is Wrong With This Picture
by DoomStone
Summary: Cliche song-fic. I kidnapped the people of the YJ Univers and blackmailed them into publicly humiliating themse- I mean, singing karaoke. I tried to match the songs to the characters as best I could. Rated M for extreme use of inappropriate language.
1. Chapter 1

**WTF is Wrong With This Picture?**

Hi everybody! I'm DoomStone, author extraordinaire! I recently acquired a very troublesome plot bunny that wouldn't leave me the fuck alone until I got it out and published it here. So here it is. I know, I know it's cliché, but like I said, it wouldn't LEAVE ME THE FUCK ALONE! *Clears throat* Just read on. And review. I need song ideas. But they have to fit the characters that sing them in some way, shape or form. Also, I DO NOT do rap, pop, or hip-hop. Don't like it? THEN DON'T READ! Another suggestion, look up any songs you don't know of so that you can get the full effect of the fic.

**Disclaimer:** I own absolutely nothing. Nothing you see. Nothing you hear.

**Chapter 1**

**Me:** Hi everybody! Check this out, I kidnapped the entire Justice League and Young Justice. They're in a top secret holding facility run by me! Anyway, I have blackmailed them all into staying and singing karaoke! Isn't that great?

**Artemis:** Yeah, yeah, this is awesome, yadda, yadda, yadda. Could we just get this over with so that we can go already?

**Me:** Fine, wow. Touchy. Our first person to go up is…(Holds up slip of paper)…Batman singing the song Bat Country by Avenged Sevenfold. (**AN:** See what I did there? Eh? Eh? No? Okay.)

**Batman:** *grumbles* When this is over, I'm SO gonna hunt you down…

He who makes a beast out of himself  
>Gets rid of the pain of being a man<p>

Caught here in a fiery blaze, won't lose my will to stay  
>I tried to drive all through the night<br>The heat stroke ridden weather, the barren empty sights  
>No oasis here to see<br>The sand is singing deathless words to me

Can't you help me? As I'm startin' to burn  
>(All alone)<br>Too many doses and I'm starting to get an attraction  
>My confidence is leaving me on my own<br>(All alone)  
>No one can save me and you know I don't want the attention<p>

As I adjust to my new sights  
>The rarely tired lights will take me to new heights<br>My hand is on the trigger I'm ready to ignite  
>Tomorrow might not make it but everything's all right<p>

Mental fiction follow me  
>Show me what it's like to be set free<p>

Can't you help me? As I'm startin' to burn  
>(All alone)<br>Too many doses and I'm starting to get an attraction  
>My confidence is leaving me on my own<br>(All alone)  
>No one can save me and you know I don't want the attention<p>

I'm sorry you're not here  
>I've been sane too long my vision's so unclear<br>Now take a trip with me  
>But don't be surprised when things aren't what they seem<p>

Caught here in a fiery blaze, won't lose my will to stay  
>These eyes won't see the same, after I flip today<p>

Sometimes I don't know why we'd rather live than die  
>We look up towards the sky for answers to our lives<br>We may get some solutions but most just pass us by  
>Don't want your absolution 'cause I can't make it right<p>

I'll make a beast out of myself  
>Gets rid of all the pain of being a man<p>

Can't you help me? As I'm startin' to burn  
>(All alone)<br>Too many doses and I'm starting to get an attraction  
>My confidence is leaving me on my own<br>(All alone)  
>No one can save me and you know I don't want the attention<p>

I'm sorry you're not here  
>I've been sane too long my vision's so unclear<br>Now take a trip with me  
>But don't be surprised when things aren't what they seem<p>

I've known it from the start  
>All these good ideas will tear your brain apart<br>Scared but you, you follow me  
>I'm too weird to live but much too rare to die<p>

**Me:** See? That wasn't so hard.

**Batman:** *Grumbles* I hate you. (Everyone stares in shock.) What?

**Kid Flash:** You can SING?

**Me:** Alright, Alright, enough. Next person to go up is…(Looks at slip of paper)…Wally! Singing one of my personal favorites, Dare to be Stupid by Weird Al Yankovic! WHOO!

(Artemis bursts out laughing and falls to the floor, crying with laughter.)

**Kid Flash:** Yeah, go ahead, laugh it up. But your moment will come, Artemis. DoomStone has a song for each and every one of us on this team. Just you watch. YOUR MOMENT WILL COME!

**Me:** Yeesh, would you cut it out with the arguing? I mean, come on! The sexual tension between you two is so thick you couldn't cut it with a butcher's knife!

**Kid Flash:** Sh-shut up! (Starts music)

Put down your chainsaw and listen to me  
>It's time for us to join in the fight<br>It's time to let your babies grow up to be cowboys  
>It's time to let the bedbugs bite<p>

You better put all your eggs in one basket  
>You better count your chickens before they hatch<br>You better sell some wine before it's/its time  
>You better find yourself an itch to scratch<p>

You better squeeze all the Charmin you can while Mr. Wimpole's not around  
>Stick your head in the microwave and get yourself a tan<p>

Talk with your mouth full  
>Bite the hand that feeds you<br>Bite on more than you chew  
>What can you do<br>Dare to be stupid

Take some wooden nickles  
>Look for Mr. Goodbar<br>Get your mojo working now  
>I'll show you how<br>You can dare to be stupid

You can turn the other cheek  
>You can just give up the ship<br>You can eat a bunch of sushi and forget to leave a tip

Dare to be stupid  
>Come on and dare to be stupid<br>It's so easy to do  
>Dare to be stupid<br>We're all waiting for you  
>Let's go<p>

It's time to make a mountain out of a molehill  
>So can I have a volunteer<br>There's no more time for crying over spilled milk  
>Now it's time for crying in your beer<p>

Settle down, raise a family, join the PTA  
>Buy some sensible shoes and a Chevyrolet<br>And party 'till you're broke and they drive you away  
>It's OK, you can dare to be stupid<p>

It's like spitting on a fish  
>It's like barking up a tree<br>It's like I said you gotta buy one if you wanna get one free

Dare to be stupid (yes)  
>Why don't you dare to be stupid<br>It's so easy to do  
>Dare to be stupid<br>We're all waiting for you  
>Dare to be stupid<p>

Burn your candle at both ends  
>Look a gift horse in the mouth<br>Mashed potatoes can be your friends

You can be a coffee achiever  
>You can sit around the house and watch Leave It To Beaver<br>The future's up to you  
>So what you gonna do<p>

Dare to be stupid  
>Dare to be stupid<br>What did I say  
>Dare to be stupid<br>Tell me, what did I say  
>Dare to be stupid<br>It's alright  
>Dare to be stupid<br>We can be stupid all night  
>Dare to be stupid<br>Come on, join the crowd  
>Dare to be stupid<br>Shout it out loud  
>Dare to be stupid<br>I can't hear you  
>Dare to be stupid<br>OK, I can hear you now  
>Dare to be stupid<br>Let's go, Dare to be stupid  
>Dare to be stupid<br>Dare to be stupid  
>Dare to be stupid<br>Dare to be stupid  
>Dare to be stupid<br>Dare to be stupid  
>Dare to be stupid<p>

(Artemis rolls on floor laughing harder than before.)

**Me:** That was great Wally! Now our next singer is, let's see…(looks at slip of paper)…Okay this might get confusing. This next song is for the whole Justice League, with the exception of Black Canary.

**Black Canary:** (Offended) What? Why?

**Me:** Because you are going to be the soloist. This next song is Preliator by Globus. And for the record, the lyrics are in Latin, so I have no idea as to what they say. (**AN:** It's true, so don't ask in your reviews.)

**Black Canary:** Fine. Just start it.

League: Hossana Meus  
>Fortuna Deus<br>Aeterna Teus  
>Mystre, Morte, Sancte, Pior<p>

Black Canary: Fortuna Hossana Meus  
>Legionus Ab Comae<br>Fortune, Fortuna Equis  
>Ad Pugnatoris, In Veritae<p>

Hossana Meus  
>Fortuna Deus<br>Protego Causa In Sanctus  
>Aeternus Praetor<br>Firmitas Semper  
>Coryphaeus Rex, Regis Univers<p>

League: Prosay Solis Hossana  
>Protego Sanctus Causa<br>Padre Illuminata  
>Gloria In Resurrectum..<p>

Prosay Solis Hossana  
>Protego Sanctus Causa<br>Padre Illuminata  
>Gloria In Unum Diem<p>

Black Canary: Terra Tenebrae  
>Telluris Malus<br>Quisere Pere Curiatus  
>Genitor Edo<br>In Ex Domino  
>Patris Illuminata Rex, Regis Univers<p>

League: Prosay Solis Hossana  
>Protego Sanctus Causa<br>Padre Alluminata  
>Gloria In Resurrectum..<br>Prosay Solis Hossana  
>Protego Sanctus Causa<br>Padre Alluminata  
>Gloria In Unum Diem<p>

Prosay Solis Hossana  
>Protego Sanctus Causa<br>Padre Alluminata  
>Gloria In Resurrectum..<br>Prosay Solis Hossana  
>Protego Sanctus Causa<br>Padre Alluminata  
>Gloria In Unum Diem<p>

All: Lacrimosa, Lacrimosa  
>In Ex Dominum<p>

(Sidekicks stare at Black Canary, then League, then Canary, then League, and back and forth)

**Green Arrow:** Damn, Dinah, I didn't know you could sing like that.

**Me:** I don't think any of us knew. Anyway, our next singer…(looks at slip of paper)…is M'gann! And her song is…(reads paper, makes a double take)…uh, okay, that's kind of awkward. Ummm… Aha! Dick, get over here!

(Robin walks over)

**Robin:** Dear god, what do you want?

**Me:** Listen, I need you to show M'gann…*whispers in ear*…You got me?

**Robin:** (Ears red) Are you sure? That one? Oh, dear lord. M'gann, come here. (M'gann floats over) This is the song you have to sing but you have to transform your voice and your appearance to the original singer and you have to dance to it. Just remember, when you see the video, I'm just the messenger.

(Turns his back to the league and everyone else, opens up his wrist computer and holds out a set of ear buds to M'gann)

**M'gann:** Uhh, Robin, why do I need these?

**Robin:** Everyone else can't know what the song is until you sing it. Now just watch and listen.

(About four minutes pass by. M'gann's face is blank as she yanks out the earphones, turns to Robin, and slaps him in the face.)

**Robin:** OW! What the fuck, Megs?

(M'gann turns and points at him.)

**M'gann:** You, shut up! (Turns and points at Me.) AND YOU ARE A SICK BASTARD!

**Me:** Yeah, I get that a lot. Now go behind that curtain over there (Points at curtain) and transform. When you're ready, yell "ready" in your normal voice.

**M'gann:** Fine. *Grumbles* I'm gonna get you for this.

(M'gann walks behind curtain. 6 seconds later…)

**M'gann:** Ready!

**Me:** Okay! Ladies and Gentlemen, M'gann M'orzz singing Rabiosa by Shakira!

**J'onn:** What? Oh, hell no…

**Me:** Too late. HIT IT M'GANN! (Curtain Drops, revealing Shakira in a bikini holding onto a pole. J'onn faints. Connor, Wally, Kaldur, and Dick all have bloody noses.)

**M'gann:**

M'gann: Rabiosa  
>If you don't get enough I'll make it double<br>I got my boy now in big, big trouble  
>You know I want you<br>Atracao ahi  
>Ratata<p>

You've got too much of that sex appeal  
>Don't play around because I'm for real<br>You see that road isn't meant for me  
>You know I want you amarrao aqui<p>

Oye papi  
>If you like it mocha<br>Come get a little closer  
>And bite me en la boca<p>

Oye papi  
>If you like it mocha<br>Come get a little closer  
>And bite me en la boca<p>

Rabiosa, rabiosa  
>Come closer, come pull me closer<br>Yo soy rabiosa, rabiosa  
>Come closer, come pull me closer<p>

Rabiosa,  
>if you don't get enough I'll make it double <p>

Pitbull recording: I'm tryin to have fun and  
>I love you but you want me<br>Atracao (ratata)

You got a lot of sex appeal Now baby I'm for real  
>You see that road isn't meant for me<br>You know I want you amarrao aqui

Oye mami  
>Let me get that mocha<br>Come get a little closer  
>And bite me en la boca<p>

M'gann: Oye papi  
>If you like it mocha<br>Come get a little closer  
>And bite me en la boca<p>

Pitbull recording: Oye mami  
>I like your mocha<br>Come get a little closer  
>And bite me en la boca<p>

M'gann: Oye papi  
>If you like it mocha<br>Come get a little closer  
>And bite me en la boca<p>

Rabiosa, rabiosa  
>Come closer, come pull me closer<br>Yo soy rabiosa, rabiosa  
>Come closer, come pull me closer<p>

Pitbull recording: Oye mami  
>Let me get that mocha<br>Come get a little closer  
>And bite me en la boca<p>

M'gann: Oye papi  
>If you like it mocha<br>Come get a little closer  
>And bite me en la boca <p>

Pitbull recording: Oye mami  
>I like your mocha<br>Come get a little closer  
>And bite me en la boca<p>

M'gann: Oye papi  
>If you like it mocha<br>Come get a little closer  
>And bite me en la boca<p>

**Me:** (wiping off bloody nose) Wow, that was hot. Well, *clears throat*, anyway that's all for now. Seeya!

**Robin:** HELP US!

**Author's Note:** Hey, like I said before, it's kinda cliché. So, read, review, and recommend songs. I'll try to put in every recommendation I get, but I will have a max amount of chapters and I will only include a grand total of FOUR songs max per chapter. You already know the rules, so I'll wait for your reviews and see you next time. But seriously. As much as it pains me to admit it, this fic is review driven. I need you guys to supply me with songs for them to sing. I'll leave you on that note. Seeya!

DoomStone


	2. Chapter 2

**WTF is Wrong With This Picture?**

Hey! I'm back, and I've got more criminal-level extortion- I mean karaoke here for you! WARNINGS: Fluffy! Spitfire, BC/GA, and Supermartian. Maybe some WonderBat. Don't know about that one yet, exactly. MAJOR Dick/Barbara. HE'S NOT SUPPOSED TO FALL IN LOVE WITH ZATANNA,NO MATTER HOW CUTE MY LITTLE SISTER SAYS THEY ARE TOGETHER!

**Disclaimer:** I own nothing. Absolutely nothing from this story, other than the plot.

**Chapter 2**

**Me:** Sooooooo… How are my favorite heroes doing?

(Silence. Everyone glares at me.)

**Me:** Yeesh. Anywho, I have the next round of songs. (Groans from league and young justice) Oh come on, they're not that bad. Our first up is…(Looks at slip of paper)…Green Arrow! And you, my Assassin's-Creed-wannabe friend, will be singing The Way You Look Tonight by Frank Sinatra.

**Green Arrow:** Well, at least the song is good…

**Me:** And you gotta sing it to Black Canary.

**Green Arrow:** Fuck you. (walks up to Black Canary, Clears throat.)

Some day, when I'm awfully low

When the world is cold

I will feel a glow just thinking of you

And the way you look tonight.

Yes you're lovely, with your smile so warm

And your cheeks so soft

There is nothing for me but to love you

And the way you look tonight.

With each word, your tenderness grows

Tearin' my fear apart

And that laugh…wrinkles your nose

Touches my foolish heart

Lovely…never, never change

Keep that breathless smile

Won't you please arrange it? 'Cause I love you

Just the way you look tonight.

[Instrumental]

And that laugh…that wrinkles your nose

It touches my foolish heart.

Lovely…don't you ever change

Keep that breathless charm

Won't you please arrange it? 'Cause I love you

a-just the way you look tonight.

Mm Mm, Mm Mm,

Just the way you look tonight.

(Clapping. Black Canary tears up and kisses Green Arrow. They start making out in a corner.)

**Me:** Awww. Isn't that sweet? (Gestures towards Black Canary and Green Arrow, who are still making out and have progressed to taking off clothes.) GAHH! You guys, Stop! I don't have any condoms for you guys, so please, just stop! (Black Canary and Green Arrow continue anyway.) Grrr, fine. I'll set up a separate room for you two. But just a warning for you guys that are still here, (Points at everyone else.) It will not be soundproof. so if you do not want to hear Green Arrow and Black Canary having hot, passionate sex, I suggest you start singing and fast. Next up is Conner singing…(looks at slip of paper)…Burn it to the Ground by Nickelback. Meanwhile, YO LANTERNS! Help me drag some wood into this place so we can make a wall!

**Conner:** Now that's my type of song.

**Superman:** Who's Conner?

**Conner:**

Well, it's midnight, damn right, we're wound up too tight  
>I've got a fist full of whiskey, the bottle just bit me<br>Oh, that shit makes me bat shit crazy  
>We've got no fear, no doubt, all in balls out<p>

We're going off tonight to kick out every light  
>Take anything that we want, drink everything in sight<br>We're going till the world stops turning  
>While we burn it to the ground tonight<p>

We're screaming like demons, swinging from the ceiling  
>I got a fist full of fifties, tequila just hit me<br>Oh, we got no class, no taste, no shirt, and shit faced  
>We got it lined up, shot down, firing back straight crown<p>

We're going off tonight to kick out every light  
>Take anything that we want, drink everything in sight<br>We're going till the world stops turning  
>While we burn it to the ground tonight<p>

Ticking like a time bomb, drinking till the night's gone  
>Well, get your hands off of this glass, last call my ass<br>Well, no chain, no lock, and this train won't stop  
>We got no friend, no doubt, all in balls out<p>

We're going off tonight to kick out every light  
>Take anything that we want, drink everything in sight<br>We're going till the world stops turning  
>While we burn it to the ground tonight<p>

We're going off tonight to kick out every light  
>Take anything that we want, drink everything in sight<br>We're going till the world stops turning  
>While we burn it to the ground tonight<p>

(Clapping and whistling)

**Robin:** WHOO! YEAH! Go Conner!

**Kid Flash:** Damn, man, you can _sing_!

**M'gann:** I loved it. (Hugs Conner.)

**Conner:** (Hugging Back, mouths, "_Fuck yeah!_", then turns around and puts M'gann down. M'gann walks away, Conner fistbumps Wally.)

(Me walks up, Gibbs-slaps both of them.)

**Me:** (addressing Conner) Dumbass! Don't take lessons from Wally! And you! (Addressing Wally) Don't give him bad info. It's hazardous to your health. In other words, Conner here'll pound you into gravy. Isn't that right, Conner-boy?

**Conner:** (cracks knuckles) Yep.

**Me:** Finally, we got the wall set up, but we saw things that will permanently scar our minds forever.

**Robin:** Like what?

**Me:** Let's just say that Black Canary is much more flexible than you think she is.

(Whole team shudders because of mental images provided by the statement and by the faint moaning coming from the makeshift wooden wall in the corner.)

**Me:** Anyway, to keep our minds off of the highly immodest things happening inside of that room-(Me is interrupted by a particularly loud moan.)…O-kay, I was saying, we have our next singer. (Checks slip of paper) And It's gonna be Robin singing Skyway Avenue by We the Kings.

**Robin:** Fine by me.

**Me:** To Barbara.

**Robin:** I fuckin' hate you.

**Artemis:** Language. Watch it. (Gibbs-slaps Robin)

**Robin:** OW! The Fuck? God, never mind.

**Me:** *Doing Ezio Auditore impression* He has much better things to do than answer your prayers. [**AN:** Like the Assassin's Creed: Revelations reference?] *Normal Voice*Now are you gonna sing or what?

**Robin:** (Glares)

She said let's change our luck  
>This night is all we've got<br>Drive fast until we crash  
>This dead end life<p>

Sweet dreams that won't come true  
>I'd leave it all for you<br>Brick walls keep closing in  
>Let's make a run tonight<p>

Blinded by the lights  
>Hold you through forever<br>Won't let you go

'Cause if you jump, I will jump too  
>We will fall together from the building's ledge<br>Never looking back at what we've done  
>We'll say it was love<br>'Cause I would die for you on Skyway Avenue

She said don't change your mind  
>Let's leave this town behind<br>We'll race right off the cliff  
>They will remember this<p>

It all got so mundane  
>With you I'm back again<br>Just take me by the hand  
>We're close to the edge<p>

Blinded by the lights  
>Hold you through forever<br>Never let you go

'Cause if you jump, I will jump too  
>We will fall together from the building's ledge<br>Never looking back at what we've done  
>We'll say it was love<br>'Cause I would die for you on Skyway Avenue

Where are your guts to fly  
>Soaring through, through the night<br>And if you take that last step I'll follow you  
>Leave the edge and fly, we're finally alive<p>

'Cause if you jump, I will jump too  
>We will fall together from the building's ledge<br>Never looking back at what we've done  
>We'll say it was love<br>'Cause I would die for you on Skyway Avenue

So what's left to prove  
>We have made it through<p>

(Clapping and Cheers)

**Barbara:** Awwww. That is so sweet, Dick. Thank you.

**Robin:** (red-faced and stuttering) U-uh, i-it's nothing really, heh heh.

**Barbara:** Well, I still love it. (Kisses Robin on the cheek.)

(Robin's face turns cherry red and he numbly touches the spot.)

**Wally:** Atta 'boy! That's my best friend!

**Me:** *Glares at Wally, says in demonic voice* LEAVE DICK ALONE!

(Wally shrinks back, afraid.)

**Me:** Anyway, our next singer is…(reads slip of paper)…Artemis!

**Artemis:** Oh god.

**Me:** *Doing Ezio Auditore impression* He has much better things to do than answer your prayers. *Normal voice* Anyway, you will have to sing AND dance to the song Mr. Saxobeat by Alexandra Stan. Go on!

**Artemis:**

You make me this,  
>Bring me up,<br>Bring me down,  
>Playing sweet,<br>Make me move like a freak,  
>Mr. Saxobeat. <p>

You make me this,  
>Bring me up,<br>Bring me down,  
>Playing sweet,<br>Make me move like a freak,  
>Mr. Saxobeat.<p>

You make me this,  
>Bring me up,<br>Bring me down,  
>Playing sweet,<br>Make me move like a freak,  
>Mr. Saxobeat.<p>

You make me this,  
>Bring me up,<br>Bring me down,  
>Playing sweet,<br>Make me move like a freak,  
>Mr. Saxobeat.<p>

Oh, yeah, mmm yeah, mmm yeah

Oh, yeah, mmm yeah, mmm yeah

Oh, yeah, mmm yeah, mmm yeah

Oh, yeah, mmm yeah, mmm yeah

Saxobeat

Saxobeat

Hey, sexy boy, set me free,  
>Don't be so shy, play with me,<br>My dirty boy, can't you see  
>That you belong next to me.<p>

You make me this,  
>Bring me up,<br>Bring me down,  
>Playing sweet,<br>Make me move like a freak,  
>Mr. Saxobeat.<p>

You make me this,  
>Bring me up,<p>

Bring me down,  
>Playing sweet,<br>Make me move like a freak,

Oh, yeah, mmm yeah, mmm yeah

Oh, yeah, mmm yeah, mmm yeah

Oh, yeah, mmm yeah, mmm yeah

Oh, yeah, mmm yeah, mmm yeah

You make me this,  
>Bring me up,<br>Bring me down,  
>Playing sweet,<br>Make me move like a freak,  
>Mr. Saxobeat.<p>

You make me this,  
>Bring me up,<br>Bring me down,  
>Playing sweet,<br>Make me move like a freak.

You make me this,  
>Bring me up,<br>Bring me down.

Mr. Saxobeat.

You make me this,  
>Bring me up,<br>Bring me down.

Mr. Saxobeat.

(Equal parts clapping and dropped jaws)

**Me:** (pushes up on Wally's jaw) Close that up, you'll catch flies. Anyway, See you all next time!

**Author's Note:** Hiya readers! I feel happy to announce that I, for the first time in my entire fanfiction experience, received two reviews within the same day as my upload. Bad part, they were my only reviews. Come on you guys! I know you're out there! Stephanie, I know you might be reading this, leave an anon review if you want. Just please recommend songs. I'm running out, and fast. I really hate becoming an author that has to beg for reviews, but this story moves on because of your reviews! I literally NEED them to continue! Don't trust anybody else to do it for you. If any of you readers want this story to continue, YOU MUST REVIEW! I cannot stress enough on the importance of it!

DoomStone


	3. Chapter 3

**WTF is Wrong With This Picture?**

Who's ready for some more KARAOKE? Ok, yea, don't really care right now. School is a bitch. I gotta be the screenwriter for a 5 minute ACTION film that has only 2 characters and no cussing. DO YOU REALISE HOW DIFFICULT THIS IS? Enjoy the chap. Oh, and just this once, pretend Zatanna's mom's name was Lucy.

**Disclaimer:** I owns nothing.

**Chapter 3**

**Me:** Hey everyone! Welcome back. You are just in time. We are about to see the next person sing for us! *Ghost Rider 2 theme music starts up* (Looking badass with glasses on) Now…our next singer is…(looks at slip of paper)…Red Arrow!

**Red Arrow:** *Grumbles* A least you got the name right…

**Me:** You are to sing Me Against the World by Simple Plan.

**Wally:** I wish we could have one of those…

**Red Arrow:** Shut up Wally! *Clears throat*

We're not gonna be  
>Just a part of their game<br>We're not gonna be  
>Just the victims<br>They're taking our dreams  
>And they tear them apart<br>'til everyone's the same  
>I've got no place to go<br>I've got nowhere to run  
>They love to watch me fall<br>They think they know it all

I'm a nightmare, a disaster  
>That's what they always said<br>I'm a lost cause, not a hero  
>But I'll make it on my own<br>I've gotta prove them wrong  
>Me against the world<br>It's me against the world

We won't let them change  
>How we feel in our hearts<br>We're not gonna let them control us  
>We won't let them shove<br>All their thoughts in our heads  
>And we'll never be like them<p>

I've got no place to go  
>I've got nowhere to run<br>They love to watch me fall  
>They think they know it all<p>

I'm a nightmare, a disaster  
>That's what they always said<br>I'm a lost cause, not a hero  
>But I'll make it on my own<br>I'm gonna prove them wrong  
>It's me against the world<br>Me against the world

Now I'm sick of this waiting  
>So come on and take your shot<br>You can spit all your insults  
>But nothing you say is gonna change us<br>You can sit there and judge me  
>Say what you want to<br>We'll never let you in

I'm a nightmare, a disaster  
>That's what they always said<br>I'm a lost cause, not a hero  
>But I'll make it on my own<br>Me against the world

I'm a nightmare, a disaster  
>That's what they always said<br>I'm a lost cause, not a hero  
>But I'll make it on my own<br>I've got to prove them wrong  
>They'll never bring us down<p>

We'll never fall in line  
>I'll make it on my own<br>Me against the world

*applause*

**Me:** Well, ain't that the truth?

**Green Arrow and Artemis:** Quiet you.

**Me:** WELL…so hostile. Anyway, that was pretty good. but let's see if our next singer can top that. Conner! You will be singing…(checks slip of paper)…Kryptonite by 3 Doors Down. Go Get 'em!

**Conner:**

Well I took a walk around the world to ease my troubled mind  
>I left my body lying somewhere in the sands of time<br>But I watched the world float to the dark side of the moon  
>I feel there is nothing I can do, yeah<p>

I watched the world float to the dark side of the moon  
>After all I knew it had to be something to do with you<br>I really don't mind what happens now and then  
>As long as you'll be my friend at the end<p>

And if I go crazy then will you still call me Superman?  
>If I'm alive and well, will you be there holding my hand?<br>I'll keep you by my side with my superhuman might  
>Kryptonite<p>

You call me strong, you call me weak  
>But still your secrets I will keep<br>You took for granted all the times  
>I never let you down<p>

You stumbled in and bumped your head  
>If not for me then you'd be dead<br>I picked you up and put you back on solid ground

If I go crazy then will you still call me Superman?  
>If I'm alive and well, will you be there holding my hand<br>I'll keep you by my side with my superhuman might  
>Kryptonite<p>

If I go crazy then will you still call me Superman?  
>If I'm alive and well, will you be there holding my hand?<br>I'll keep you by my side with my superhuman might  
>Kryptonite, yeah<p>

If I go crazy then will you still call me Superman?  
>If I'm alive and well, will you be there holding my hand?<br>I'll keep you by my side with my superhuman might  
>Kryptonite<p>

*applause*

**Conner:** Nailed it.

**Me:** Wow, Conner, you really got this singing thing down. Have you been practicing?

**Conner:** *Blushes* Kinda.

**Me:** Dude, please tell me it's not while you're in the shower.

**Conner:** *Blushes deeper*

**Me:** (sigh) Oh boy. While I help Conner rediscover his masculinity, please enjoy the next singer, which is…Artemis singing…Oh. Yo Robin!

**Robin:** God help me.

**Me:** *Doing Ezio Auditore impression* He has much better things to do than answer your prayers. *Normal voice* Anyway, show this to Artemis and explain what she's gotta do.

**Robin:** (Looks at paper. Does double take.) *Whining* But why can't you? I'm gonna get my ass kicked. AGAIN!

**Me:** That's the whole point of making you do it! The audience and I get to laugh our guts out while watching you get pummeled within an inch of your life. NOW DO IT!

**Robin:** Artemis, get over here. *Turns on wrist computer* same rules apply to you that applied to M'gann with her song. Curtain and outfit are over there. Now, don't hurt me, this is the song.

(Artemis listens to song. Rips out earbuds. Walks over to curtain.)

(3 minutes later)

**Artemis:** Ready!

**Robin:** Oh, and I forgot to mention, you gotta sing it to Wally!

**Wally:** Oh god.

**Me:** *Doing Ezio Auditore impression* He has much better things to do than answer yo-

(Artemis bursts out from behind the curtain wearing a sexy French maid costume and looking absolutely livid.)

**Artemis:** You little…

**Me:** And now Artemis singing La La by Ashlee Simpson!

**Artemis:** Grrr…

You can dress me up in diamonds  
>You can dress me up in dirt<br>You can throw me like a line-man  
>I like it better when it hurts<p>

Oh, I have waited here for you  
>I have waited<p>

You make me wanna la la  
>in the kitchen on the floor<br>I'll be a French maid  
>Where I'll meet you at the door<br>I'm like an alley cat  
>Drink the milk up, I want more<br>You make me wanna  
>You make me wanna scream<p>

You can meet me on an aero-plane  
>Or in the back of the bus<br>You can throw me like a boomerang  
>I'll come back and beat you up<p>

Oh, I have waited here for you  
>Don't, keep me waiting<p>

You make me wanna la la  
>in the kitchen on the floor<br>I'll be a French maid  
>Where I'll meet you at the door<br>I'm like an alley cat  
>Drink the milk up, I want more<br>You make me wanna

You make me wanna la la  
>in the kitchen on the floor<br>I'll be a French maid  
>Where I'll meet you at the door<br>I'm like an alley cat  
>Drink the milk up, I want more<br>You make me wanna  
>You make me wanna scream<p>

I feel safe with you  
>I can be myself tonight<br>It's alright, with you  
>Cuz you hold, my secrets tight<br>You do, You do

You make me wanna la la, la la la, la la, la la la la la la la la la  
>You make me wanna la la, la la la<p>

You make me wanna la la  
>in the kitchen on the floor<br>I'll be a French maid  
>When I'll meet you at the door<br>I'm like an alley cat  
>Drink the milk up, I want more<br>You make me wanna  
>You make me wanna la la<br>in the kitchen on the floor  
>I'll be a French maid<br>Where I'll meet you at the door  
>I'm like an alley cat<br>Drink the milk up, I want more  
>You make me wanna<br>You make me wanna scream

You make me wanna la la, la la la, la la, la la la la la la la la la  
>You make me wanna la la, la la la la<br>You make me wanna la la, la la la, la la, la la la la la la la la la  
>You make me wanna la la, la la la la<br>You make me wanna la la, la la la, la la, la la la la la la la la la  
>You make me wanna la la, la la la la<p>

*Applause*

(Wally wipes off nosebleed.)

**Me:** Well…That was interesting. Next up is…(reads slip of paper)…I can't believe it. Zatara.

**Zatara:** Oh dear.

**Me:** No, it's okay. The song you have to sing is one of my recent favorites: Lucy by Skillet.

**Zatara:** Oh. okay.

**Zatanna:** Uh oh.

**Zatara:**

Hey Lucy, I remember your name  
>I left a dozen roses on your grave today<br>I'm in the grass on my knees, wipe the leaves away  
>I just came to talk for a while, got some things I need to say<p>

Now that it's over, I just wanna hold her  
>I'd give up all the world to see<br>That little piece of Heaven looking back at me

Now that it's over, I just wanna hold her  
>I've gotta live with the choices I made<br>And I can't live with myself today

Hey Lucy, I remembered your birthday  
>They said it'd bring some closure to say your name<br>I know I'd do it all different if I had the chance  
>But all I got are these roses to give<br>And they can't help me make amends

Now that it's over, I just wanna hold her  
>I'd give up all the world to see<br>That little piece of Heaven looking back at me

Now that it's over, I just wanna hold her  
>I've gotta live with the choices I made<br>And I can't live with myself today

Here we are, now you're in my arms  
>I never wanted anything so bad<br>Here we are for a brand new start  
>Living the life that we could've had<p>

Me and Lucy walking hand in hand  
>Me and Lucy never wanna end<br>Just another moment in your eyes  
>I'll see you in another life in Heaven<br>Where we never say goodbye

Now that it's over, I just wanna hold her  
>I'd give up all the world to see<br>That little piece of Heaven looking back at me

Now that it's over, I just wanna hold her  
>I've gotta live with the choices I made<br>And I can't live with myself today

Here we are, now you're in my arms  
>Here we are for a brand new start<br>I got to live with the choices I've made  
>And I can't live with myself today<p>

Me and Lucy walking hand in hand  
>Me and Lucy never wanna end<br>I've got to live with the choices I've made  
>And I can't live with myself today<p>

Hey Lucy, I remember your name

*Applause. Zatara starts to tear up.*

**Zatanna:** Oh, daddy. (Goes up and hugs Zatara) I know you miss mom. It's okay.

**Me:** Wait, you mean that your wife's name was…Oh. I'm so sorry. I'm, uh, I'm just gonna get to the next singer if that's alright with you…

**Zatara:** No, I'm okay. I'm okay. Continue.

**Me:** If you say so…Our next singers are the whole Young Justice team. You guys will sing Re-education (Through Labor) by Rise Against. However, this time, you are gonna be a band. Wally, you're on the drums, Conner, guitar, Kaldur, bass, M'gann, soundboard, Artemis, you are the second guitar, and Robin is the lead singer. All of you sing though. Just, Robin gets the verses. Okay, your instruments are over there.

*Each member gets their respective instrument*

**Robin:** Okay, you guys ready? (Receives affirmative.) Alright let's go!

To the sound of a heartbeat pounding away  
>To the rhythm of the awful rusted machines<br>We toss and turn but don't sleep  
>Each breath we take makes us thieves<br>Like causes without rebels  
>Just talk but promise nothing else <p>

**The whole team:**

We crawl on our knees for you  
>Under a sky no longer blue<br>We sweat all day long for you  
>But we sow seeds to see us through<br>'Cause sometimes dreams just don't come true  
>We wait to reap what we are due <p>

**Robin:**

To the rhythm of a time bomb ticking away  
>And the blare of the sirens combing the streets<br>Chased down like dogs we run from  
>Your grasp until the sun comes up <p>

**The whole team:**

We crawl on our knees for you  
>Under a sky no longer blue<br>We sweat all day long for you  
>But we sow seeds to see us through<br>'Cause sometimes dreams just don't come true  
>Look now at what they've done to you <p>

**Robin:**

White needle's buried in the red  
>The engine roars and then it gives<br>But never dies  
>'Cause we don't live<br>We just survive  
>On the scraps that you throw away <p>

**The whole team:**

I won't crawl on my knees for you  
>I won't believe the lies that hide the truth<br>I won't sweat one more drop for you  
>'Cause we are the rust upon your gears<br>We are the insect in your ears  
>We crawl<br>We crawl  
>We crawl... all over you<p>

We sow the seeds to see us through  
>Our days are precious and so few<br>We all reap what we are due  
>Under this sky no longer blue<br>We bring the dawn long overdue  
>We crawl<br>We crawl  
>We crawl... all over you!<p>

*Applause*

**Me:** Well, goodbye again.

**Wally:** Save us!

**Author's Note:** Hello readers. I gotta say, I am very disappointed with the lack of reviews. I thought you guys cared enough about the story to leave reviews with actual songs. I guess I was wrong. This time around, I'm not updating until I have at least 4 new songs to make them sing. I'm being serious here. DoomStone


	4. Chapter 4

**WTF is Wrong With This Picture?**

Hehehe, hey guys… S'been a while, hasn't it? I'm horribly sorry. I've been so stressed with school, and the new restrictions on my typing enforced by my wardens- I mean my parents, have been really slowing me down. I don't think I'll be updating much until Summer starts. And for those of you readers in the southern hemisphere, in Florida, where I live, we have Summer vacation from June to late August. I'll have a LOT of free time then. Or, at least, the availability to type during the week as well as weekends. I'm sorry, but that's how it is. I MIGHT update occasionally between now and June, but there will be serious gaps, like the one in between now and the last I updated. So, without further ado, enjoy the show!

**Disclaimer:** I do not own anything.

**Chapter 4**

**Me:** HEY! 'Sup everybody? Hows haive thysaylves been? I has MANY, MANY moar songs for YOOOUUUUUUUUUU! (gets slapped in the face by Artemis) Gah! Okay, I'm fine now. I've gotta say, a tragedy has occurred. In honor of Zatara's passing, we will have a more serious show tonight. Our first singer shall be…Zatanna, singing My Immortal by Evanescence in honor of her fallen father.

**Zatanna:** Thank you for the kind words, You.

**Me:** Your welcome. It's the least I can do.

(Everyone stares at Me in disbelief)

**Me:** WHAT? Why does it surprise all of you so much that I can be a serious gentleman when I want to?

**Artemis:** It's not like that, really it isn't. It's just…you just…

**Aqualad:** Caught us off guard with your sudden sincerity.

**Artemis:** Thanks Kal.

**Me:** Okay, if you're all done insulting me, I'd like to continue with the show! Zatanna, if you don't mind…

**Zatanna:** Not at all.

I'm so tired of being here  
>Suppressed by all my childish fears<br>And if you have to leave  
>I wish that you would just leave<br>Your presence still lingers here  
>And it won't leave me alone<p>

These wounds won't seem to heal  
>This pain is just too real<br>There's just too much that time cannot erase

When you cried I'd wipe away all of your tears  
>When you'd scream I'd fight away all of your fears<br>And I held your hand through all of these years  
>But you still have<br>All of me

You used to captivate me  
>By your resonating light<br>Now I'm bound by the life you left behind  
>Your face it haunts<br>My once pleasant dreams  
>Your voice it chased away<br>All the sanity in me

These wounds won't seem to heal  
>This pain is just too real<br>There's just too much that time cannot erase

When you cried I'd wipe away all of your tears  
>When you'd scream I'd fight away all of your fears<br>And I held your hand through all of these years  
>But you still have<br>All of me

I've tried so hard to tell myself that you're gone  
>But though you're still with me<br>I've been alone all along

When you cried I'd wipe away all of your tears  
>When you'd scream I'd fight away all of your fears<br>And I held your hand through all of these years  
>But you still have<br>All of me

(Sniffles)

**Me:** (walks up and hugs Zatanna) Shhhh, shhhh, it's okay, it's okay. Everything's going to be fine. (straightens up) Okay, now the next singer will be-

**Dr. Fate:** Me.

**Me:** (narrows eyes) Why are _you_ here, Fate? You took away Zatanna's FATHER! Ripped him from her as a child! Some Lord of Order you are…

**Dr. Fate:** Watch your tongue, maggot. The Earth NEEDED Dr. Fate. But I myself am not going to sing.

**Me:** Wait, if it's not you, then who-

**Dr. Fate:** Zatara and I have worked out an agreement bound by magic. I will let him free from the helmet only as long as it takes to send his daughter a message. Then he goes back. (addressing Zatanna) I'm guessing you want to hear your father speak to you, so I suggest you get that mortal to stop mouthing off.

**Zatanna:** Sorry You, but, (punches Me in the face, knocking Me out.) I'm taking over. (Addressing Dr. Fate) Let him out.

(Zatara takes off the helmet of Fate.)

**Zatara:** Zatanna, I am very sorry, but I'm only able to sing you a song. Anthem of the Angels by Breaking Benjamin is my selection.

**Kid Flash:** Pretty good taste Zat-

**Zatara:** I do not have time to deal with you!

White walls surround us  
>No light will touch your face again<br>Rain taps the window  
>As we sleep among the dead<p>

Days go on forever  
>But I have not left your side<br>We can chase the dark together  
>If you go then so will I<p>

There is nothing left of you  
>I can see it in your eyes<br>Sing the anthem of the angels  
>And say the last goodbye<p>

Cold light above us  
>Hope fills the heart<br>And fades away  
>Skin white as winter<br>As the sky returns to grey

Days go on forever  
>But I have not left your side<br>We can chase the dark together  
>If you go then so will I<p>

There is nothing left of you  
>I can see it in your eyes<br>Sing the anthem of the angels  
>And say the last goodbye<br>I keep holding onto you  
>But I can't bring you back to life<br>Sing the anthem of the angels  
>Then say the last goodbye<p>

You're dead alive

You're dead alive

You're dead alive

You're dead alive

There is nothing left of you  
>I can see it in your eyes<br>Sing the anthem of the angels  
>And say the last goodbye<br>I keep holding onto you  
>But I can't bring you back to life<br>Sing the anthem of the angels  
>And say the last goodbye<p>

Sing the anthem of the angels

And say the last goodbye

Sing the anthem of the angels

(Zatara's eyes light up gold. Zatara picks up the Helmet of Fate and puts it back on. Zatanna starts to cry.)

**Me:** Okay, I'm okay. I woke up halfway through the song. Anthem of the Angels. It's a very touching song. But now, Dr. Fate, I want YOU to sing a song.

**Dr. Fate:** Oh, and what song would you ask of me to sing?

**Me:** (Smugly) Tear Away by Drowning Pool. Go.

**Dr. Fate:**

I'm tearing away  
>Pieces are falling I can't seem to make them stay<br>You run away  
>Faster and faster you can't seem to get away<br>Break

Hope there's a reason  
>For questions unanswered I just don't see everything<br>Yes I'm inside you  
>Tell me how does it feel to feel like this<br>Just like I do

I don't care about anyone else but me  
>I don't care about anyone<br>I don't care about anyone else but me  
>I don't care about anyone<p>

Do I really want this  
>Sometimes I scare myself I just can't let it go<br>Can you believe it  
>Everything happens for reasons I just don't know<p>

I don't care about anyone else but me  
>I don't care about anyone<br>I don't care about anyone else but me  
>I don't care about anyone or anything but me<p>

God damn I love me

I don't care about anyone else but me  
>I don't care about anyone<br>I don't care about anyone else but me  
>I don't care about anyone or anything<br>I don't care about anyone else but me  
>I don't care about anyone<p>

**Me:** (Smugly) Thank you, that'll be all. Our next performance is the whole Young Justice team PLUS Red Arrow and Batgirl. You will sing The Catalyst, by Linkin Park. Aqualad will lead with Mike's part. Robin will take Chester's part. Everyone else, you know what to do.

**Aqualad:**

God bless us everyone  
>We're a broken people living under loaded gun<br>And it can't be outfought  
>It can't be outdone<br>It can't be outmatched  
>It can't be outrun<p>

No

**Aqualad & Robin:**  
>God bless us everyone<br>We're a broken people living under loaded gun  
>And it can't be outfought<br>It can't be outdone  
>It can't be outmatched<br>It can't be outrun  
>Ooh<p>

**Robin:**  
>And when I close my eyes tonight<br>To symphonies of blinding light 

**All:**  
>God bless us everyone<br>We're a broken people living under loaded gun

Ooh 

**Robin:**  
>Like memories in cold decay<br>Transmissions echoing away  
>Far from the world of you and I<br>Where oceans bleed into the sky 

**All:**  
>God save us everyone<br>Will we burn inside the fires of a thousand suns  
>For the sins of our hands<br>The sins of our tongues  
>The sins of our fathers<br>The sins of our young  
>No<p>

God save us everyone  
>Will we burn inside the fires of a thousand suns<br>For the sins of our hands  
>The sins of our tongues<br>The sins of our fathers  
>The sins of our young<br>Ooh 

**Robin:**  
>And when I close my eyes tonight<br>To symphonies of blinding light 

**All:**  
>God save us everyone<br>Will we burn inside the fires of a thousand suns  
>Ooh<p>

**Robin:**  
>Like memories in cold decay<br>Transmissions echoing away  
>Far from the world of you and I<br>Where oceans bleed into the sky 

**All:**

Ooh

**Robin:**

Like memories in cold decay  
>Transmissions echoing away<br>Far from the world of you and I  
>Where oceans bleed into the sky<p>

Lift me up  
>Let me go<p>

Lift me up  
>Let me go<p>

Lift me up  
>Let me go<p>

Lift me up  
>Let me go <p>

Lift me up  
>Let me go<p>

Lift me up  
>Let me go<p>

Lift me up 

**Aqualad:**

God bless us everyone  
>We're a broken people living under loaded gun<br>And it can't be outfought  
>It can't be outdone<br>It can't be outmatched  
>It can't be outrun<br>No

**All:**

God bless us everyone  
>We're a broken people living under loaded gun<br>And it can't be outfought  
>It can't be outdone<br>It can't be outmatched  
>It can't be outrun<p>

**Me:** And that was our personal memorial for Zatara. Review please! I'll see you next time.

**Artemis:** Help us! I beg of you!


	5. Chapter 5

**WTF is Wrong With This Picture?**

Hi everyone. I know, I know I haven't been on here in almost forever. School, parents, responsibility, me being chosen as Vice President of my schools Creative Writing Club, you know how it is. But still, that is no excuse. Here, I give a peace offering. A DOUBLE UPDATE! WHOO! On with it.

**Chapter 5**

**Me:** Hey there! I know, it's been a while. I've been having to rethink EVERYTHING because of Invasion. So here we GO!

**U P D A T E**

**Me:** Ah, that's better. Now, our first singer is…Superman!

**Superman:** Uh oh.

**Me:** As a side comment, with this song, we'll be acknowledging your lesser known but apparently dominant roots. Now get ready for The Devil Went Down to Georgia by Charlie Daniels!

**Superman:** (Not joking.) Well you are simply hilarious.

The Devil went down to Georgia. He was lookin' for a soul to steal.  
>He was in a bind 'cause he was way behind, and he was willin' to make a deal.<br>When he came across this young man sawin' on a fiddle and playin' it hot,  
>And the Devil jumped up on a hickory stump and said, "Boy, let me tell you what.<p>

"I guess you didn't know it but I'm a fiddle player too.  
>And if you'd care to take a dare, I'll make a bet with you.<br>Now, you play pretty good fiddle, boy, but give the Devil his due.  
>I'll bet a fiddle of gold against your soul, 'cause I think I'm better than you."<p>

The boy said, "My name's Johnny, and it might be a sin.  
>But I'll take your bet, you're gonna regret, 'cause I'm the best that's ever been."<p>

Johnny, rosin up your bow and play your fiddle hard,  
>'Cause hell's broke loose in Georgia and the Devil deals the cards.<br>And if you win you get this shiny fiddle made of gold.  
>But if you lose, the Devil gets your soul.<p>

The Devil opened up his case and he said, "I'll start this show."  
>And fire flew from his fingertips as he rosined up his bow.<br>And he pulled the bow across the strings and it made an evil hiss.  
>Then a band of demons joined in and it sounded somethin' like this:<p>

When the Devil finished, Johnny said, "Well, you're pretty good, old son,  
>but sit down in that chair right there and let me show you how it's done."<p>

Fire on the mountain. Run, boys, run.  
>The devil's in the House of the Rising Sun.<br>Chicken in the bread pan pickin' out dough.  
>Granny, does your dog bite? No, child, no.<p>

That old devil bowed his head because he knew that he'd been beat,  
>And he laid that golden fiddle on the ground at Johnny's feet.<br>Johnny said, "Devil, just come on back if you ever want to try again.  
>Cause I told you once, you son of a bitch, I'm the best that's ever been."<p>

He played:

Fire on the mountain. Run, boys, run.  
>The devil's in the House of the Rising Sun.<br>Chicken in the bread pan pickin' out dough.  
>Granny, will your dog bite? No, child, no.<p>

**Superboy:** Nice. *Brofist*

**Me:** You know, it's great to see you two get along, but Superboy, I don't like your sudden fondness for country music. It's unnatural.

(Superboy gives Me the bird behind Superman's back.)

**Me:** Well. Excuse me. Next is Kid Flash singing Animals by Nickelback.

**Wally:** I'm, uh, not Kid Flash anymore. But nice choice all the same.

**Me:** Sing it to Artemis.

**Wally:** Fuck you!

**Me:** Is that a threat or a promise?

**Wally:** *blanches* Gah! You just had to make it awkward.

**Artemis:** I don't get it. What's so awkward about the song?

**Me:** Shhhh, shhhh. Wait for it.

**Wally:**

I, I'm driving black on black  
>Just got my license back<br>I got this feeling in my veins this train is coming off the track  
>I'll ask polite if the devil needs a ride<br>Because the angel on my right ain't hanging out with me tonight  
>I'm driving past your house while you were sneaking out<br>I got the car door opened up so you can jump in on the run  
>Your mom don't know that you were missing<br>She'd be pissed if she could see the parts of you that I've been kissing  
>Screamin'<p>

No, we're never gonna quit  
>Ain't nothing wrong with it<br>Just acting like we're animals  
>No, no matter where we go<br>'Cause everybody knows  
>We're just a couple of animals<p>

So come on baby, get in  
>Get in, just get in<br>Check out the trouble we're in

You're beside me on the seat  
>Got your hand between my knees<br>And you control how fast we go by just how hard you wanna squeeze  
>It's hard to steer when you're breathing in my ear<br>But I got both hands on the wheel while you got both hands on my gears  
>By now, no doubt that we were heading south<br>I guess nobody ever taught her not to speak with a full mouth  
>'Cause this was it, like flicking on a switch<br>It felt so good I almost drove into the ditch  
>I'm screamin'<p>

No, we're never gonna quit  
>Ain't nothing wrong with it<br>Just acting like we're animals  
>No, no matter where we go<br>'Cause everybody knows  
>We're just a couple of animals<p>

So come on baby, get in  
>Get in, just get in<br>Look at the trouble we're in

We were parked out by the tracks  
>We're sitting in the back<br>And we just started getting busy  
>When she whispered "what was that?"<br>The wind, I think 'cause no one else knows where we are  
>And that was when she started screamin'<br>"That's my dad outside the car!"  
>Oh please, the keys, they're not in the ignition<br>Must have wound up on the floor while  
>we were switching our positions<br>I guess they knew that she was missing  
>As I tried to tell her dad it was her mouth that I was kissing<br>Screamin'

No, we're never gonna quit  
>Ain't nothing wrong with it<br>Just acting like we're animals  
>No, no matter where we go<br>'Cause everybody knows  
>We're just a couple of animals<p>

So come on baby, get in  
>We're just a couple of animals<br>Get in, just get in  
>Ain't nothing wrong with it<br>Check out the trouble we're in  
>Get in, just get in<p>

**Green Arrow:** Are you trying to say something, Ginger? Because remember-

**Me:** Whoa, whoa, whoa. Whoa. Hold your horses, G-A. They're legal adults. Besides, they're in college. They wouldn't be able to get it on…much.

(Wally and Artemis scowl at the insinuation while blushing.) (Because it's true.)

**Me:** And Artemis is a cheerleader, so neither you nor I know what kind of freaky-ass shit they've come up with. Although, I gotta say, YOU probably would know. After all, you do have Black Canary…

**Wally:** *Goes horribly pale* N-No! Shut UP You! You're doing this on purpose you bastard.

**Me:** Dude, get creative with those nicknames. I've heard that one so many times, I got bored of it. Next up is Kaldur, singing Your Betrayal by Bullet for My Valentine to the rest of the team.

**Kaldur:** For Tula.

Am I going insane? (insane)  
>My blood is boiling inside of my veins<br>An evil feeling attacks (attacks)  
>My body's shaking, there's no turning back<p>

Don't take your eyes off the trigger  
>I'm not to blame if your world turns to black<br>As your eyes start to blister  
>There's just no hope for our final embrace<p>

So here we are...I'm in your head...  
>I'm in your heart!<p>

You were told to run away,  
>Soak the place and light the flame<br>Pay the price for your betrayal  
>Your betrayal, your betrayal!<p>

I was told to stay away  
>Those two words I can't obey<br>Pay the price for your betrayal  
>Your betrayal, your betrayal!<p>

Is it my turn to die?  
>My heart is pounding as I say goodbye<br>So now I dance in the flames  
>I love you crying and screaming my name<p>

You said that we'd be forever  
>How could you kill me and lie to my face?<br>Now that we can't be together  
>There's just no hope for our final embrace<p>

So here we are...I'm in your head...  
>I'm in your heart!<p>

You were told to run away,  
>Soak the place and light the flame<br>Pay the price for your betrayal  
>Your betrayal, your betrayal!<p>

I was told to stay away  
>Those two words I can't obey<br>Pay the price for your betrayal  
>Your betrayal, your betrayal!<p>

So here we are... (so here we are)  
>I'm in your head... (I'm in your head)<br>I'm in your heart!

You were told to run away,  
>Soak the place and light the flame<br>Pay the price for your betrayal  
>Your betrayal, your betrayal!<p>

I was told to stay away  
>Those two words I can't obey<br>Pay the price for your betrayal  
>Your betrayal, your betrayal!<p>

**Me:** Damn. Spot on, man, great job. Now go sit in the corner and sulk like the villain you've become. Good boy!

**Wonder Girl:** The hell?

**Batgirl:** I have no idea.

**Me:** Shut UP, will you?

**Nightwing:** Hey! That's my girl that you're yelling at. Respect her, or else.

***OFF TO THE SIDE***

**Wonder Girl:** Dat ass.

**Cheshire:** (Addressing Artemis.) What is with us and redheads? Either one of us coulda had that!

**Artemis:** *Swoons*

**Black Canary:** It's so perfect. I can't even begin to describe it.

**Batgirl:** And it's all mine.

(All stare at Batgirl, who blushes.)

**Black Canary:** Excuse me?

***AWAY FROM THE SIDE***

**Me:** *Smirks* You think you're so tough? Sing Girl I Know by Avenged Sevenfold. And know that according to the context of our conversation, you're singing it about Batgirl. Now go sing it to Batman.

**Nightwing:** Fine.

Let me tell you about a girl I know  
>That comes alive when you take off her clothes<br>There's no telling just where she's been  
>Ask around but no one seems to know yeah<p>

(yeah)

Late at night when you're looking to sin  
>Call her up and she'll lay down the law<br>You can't trust her cause she'll lie to your face  
>But that's not why you gave her a call<p>

(yeah)

Awaits deep inside  
>The lust and burning desire<p>

We've all been more than eager to sin  
>And it feels alright<br>Til we pay the price  
>Now you choose either naughty or nice<br>Cause she's here for you it's all yours tonight

You won't believe the stories I've been told  
>About a girl I know<p>

Another thing about this girl I know  
>She's more comfortable down on her knees<br>Went to school got a job and then she shot it to hell  
>All cause she's born to please yeah<p>

(yeah)

Don't get her mixed up because she knows what she likes  
>Can't tell the difference between<br>Right or wrong  
>She knows your watching every one of her moves<br>Just more reason to string you along yeah

Awaits deep inside  
>The lust and burning desire<p>

We've all been more than eager to sin  
>And it feels alright<br>Til we pay the price  
>Now you choose either naughty or nice<br>Cause she's here for you it's all yours tonight

You won't believe the stories I've been told  
>About a girl I know<p>

The first time's hard enough  
>But you made it through<br>The second time  
>I see the changes in you<br>She's got you somehow  
>You're needing her now<p>

(yeah)

We've all been more than eager to sin  
>And it feels alright<br>Til we pay the price  
>Now you choose either naughty or nice<br>Cause she's here for you it's all yours tonight

You won't believe the stories I've been told  
>About a girl I know<p>

There. Happy?

**Batman:** I'm not.

**Nightwing:** *Blanches* Oh, shit.

**Batman:** Tell me, what exactly have you been doing…(Both walk away to a distant corner.)

**Me:** Twenty bucks says the Big Bad Bat's gonna dish out some bedroom advice. Care to give some tips yourself, Artemis? Or how about you, Cheshire?

**Artemis & Cheshire:** Go to Hell.

**Me:** But I don't wanna go back to school!


	6. Chapter 6

**WTF is Wrong With This Picture?**

Second Update. WHOOT! Sorry about the whole "Double Update" thing, but my parents got in the way.

**Chapter 6**

**Me:** And we're back. I'mma just get down to business. First singer up is Miss Martian, singing Set Fire to Everybody, the Skrillex remix of Set Fire to the Rain by Adele.

**Miss Martian:** Doesn't sound too bad.

_I let it fall, my heart,__  
><em>_And as it fell you rose to claim it.__  
><em>_It was dark and I was over,__  
><em>_Until you kissed my lips and you saved me.__  
><em>_My hands they're strong, but my knees were far too weak, to__  
><em>_stand in your arms without falling to your feet,___

_But there's a side to you that I never knew, never knew.__  
><em>_All the things you'd say, they were never true, never true,__  
><em>_And the games you'd play, you would always win, always win.___

_But I set fire to the rain,__  
><em>_Watched it pour as I touched your face,__  
><em>_well, it burned while I cried,__  
><em>_Cause I heard it screaming out your name, your name!___

_When i lay with you I could stay there,__  
><em>_Close my eyes, feel you here forever,__  
><em>_You and me together, nothing is better!___

_Cause there's a side to you that I never, never knew,__  
><em>_All the things you'd say, they were never true, never true,__  
><em>_And the games you'd play, you would always win, always win.___

_But I set fire to the rain,__  
><em>_Watched it pour as I touched your face,__  
><em>_well, it burned while I cried,__  
><em>_Cause I heard it screaming out your name, your name!__  
><em>_I set fire to the rain__  
><em>_And I threw us into the flames__  
><em>_when we fell something died,__  
><em>_Cause I knew that that was the last time, the last time!___

_Sometimes I wake up by the door,__  
><em>_That heart you caught must be waiting for you__  
><em>_Even now when we're already over__  
><em>_I can't help myself from looking for you.___

_I set fire to the rain,__  
><em>_Watched it pour as I touched your face,__  
><em>_well, it burned while I cried,__  
><em>_Cause I heard it screaming out your name, your name__  
><em>_I set fire to the rain,__  
><em>_And I threw us into the flames__  
><em>_when we fell something died__  
><em>_Cause I knew that that was the last time__  
><em>_The last time, oh, oh no__  
><em>_let it burn oh__  
><em>_let it burn__  
><em>_let it burn_

**Wonder Girl:** WHOO!

**Batgirl:** You said it girl.

**Artemis:** Testify, M'gann! Testify!

**Me:** Okay, Okay. That's enough. The next singer I'm calling up is…oh. Make that SINGERS. Lagoon Boy, Blue Beetle, and Robin!

**Robin:** Uh oh.

**Lagoon Boy:** Why is it that this doesn't seem to be a good idea?

**Blue Beetle:** Get me the hell out of here! (Pause.) No, I don't care about the possibilities, just get me out of here! (Pause.) Fine! Fuck you too.

**Me:** Oh-kay? You guys will be singing, in tandem, the Literal Assassin's Creed: Revelations Trailer by Tobuscus.

**Robin, Lagoon Boy, & Blue Beetle:**

_Stargate, Ubisoft, Sparkle.__  
><em>_Fade in to the left hand__  
><em>_of a sleepy man.__  
><em>_How'd he fall asleep there?__  
><em>_Help up the sleepy hooded man.__  
><em>_That's what beds are for.__  
><em>_Drag him cross the stone floor.__  
><em>_Front shot then a shot from the ceiling.__  
><em>_He could get carpet burned.__  
><em>_Slow fade.__  
><em>_Cut to white on a boat, I'm looking ahead.__  
><em>_Holding on a rope.__  
><em>_I am... nauseous,__  
><em>_Now I'm alone, and walking away.__  
><em>_And I'm afraid of heights.__  
><em>_Oh sh**, how'd I get up here?__  
><em>_If I fall then I would be dead.__  
><em>_I made it down alright.__  
><em>_I feel great... RAAHH!__  
><em>_GOD! COME ON!__  
><em>_Whoever shot that arrow's gonna pay.__  
><em>_Enter Bald Guy With a Cape.__  
><em>_Break the arrow off, you can take a bald guy.__  
><em>_Then you see the bald guy__  
><em>_joined by some other guys.__  
><em>_RUN UP!__  
><em>_In slow motion, kick a guy in the head.__  
><em>_Stab his friend.__  
><em>_Spin around, roll off.__  
><em>_Punch a face.__  
><em>_Start out in slow motion first,__  
><em>_then use your speed hack.__  
><em>_Grab a sword, use it to deflect.__  
><em>_Stab him in the back.__  
><em>_Get down just in time, and__  
><em>_slap him in the face.__  
><em>_Friendly Fire's on, apparently.__  
><em>_Why unsheath your blade?__  
><em>_Make 'em use their own.__  
><em>_Time out, lemme get my Weap's...__  
><em>_IN SLOW-MO.__  
><em>_I am the first X-Man.__  
><em>_That joke's ahead of our time,__  
><em>_but you still gonna die!__  
><em>_Who the hell is that guy?__  
><em>_The second X-Man.__  
><em>_Don't watch him walk away,__  
><em>_or you'll lose a hidden blade__  
><em>_and get surrounded.__  
><em>_OOWHITE!__  
><em>_Evil Bald Guy With a Cape.__  
><em>_Ezio plans his escape.__  
><em>_Boss waits patiently, Ezio shakes free__  
><em>_All the Royal Guards pee themselves__  
><em>_Main Boss calls them off with his right hand__  
><em>_Slow dramatic zoom-pan.__  
><em>_Doesn't faze the hooded man.__  
><em>_Cape-Clad Bald Guy Sentence Ezio To Die.__  
><em>_Then he sees Altair from the first game.__  
><em>_He used to jump off those, anyway.__  
><em>_Under each of those there's a bale of hay.__  
><em>_After you synchronize, Leap of Faith.__  
><em>_Nod at the bird PEOPLE DIE,__  
><em>_Everywhere PEOPLE DIE._

_Duh dun, due du, due du, due du doo, subscribe!_

**Me:** Whoo!

**Wonder Girl:** What… the fuck…was THAT?

**Me:** The largest of all stupidities, according to my other personality. Now let's cut the chit-chat, I'm hoping to double the amount of singers this chapter.

**Wonder Girl:** Hey! Don't test me, asshat.

**Me:** WELL! Look who decided to grow a pair and finally help out her buddies, eh?

**Wonder Girl:** Oh, no you fucking didn't. OH, NO YOU FUCKING DIDN"T!

(Everyone else has a wonderful time trying to hold poor, rabid Cassie back while Me steps out to get some McDonalds with his friends Rinnie, JV, Yoko, Steph, Elwire, Cyfy, and D-man.) (**A/N:** No joke, each of those nicknames has something to do with the friend they're associated with.)

**Beast Boy:** Hey guys! Where'd Me go?

(All look around confused.)

**Robin:** Hey, wait! I found a note!

**Mal Duncan:** Well little man? What's it say?

**Robin:** Ok, it says:

_Dear captives,_

_ Yeah, I'll bet you forgot you were captives, didn't ya? Well, NOT IN MY BASEMENT! Hehe, ahem. Anyway, I would like for the show to go on while I'm gone with my friends. Here's the list of people that still need to sing. Good luck! You're gonna need it._

_ Your kidnapper,_

_ Me_

(Everyone stays quiet for a minute.)

**Impulse:** Well, I don't know about you guys, but I totally forgot that we were abducted.

**Kid Flash:** Are you brain-dead or something? You didn't show up until about two chapters ago.

**Impulse:** Aaaaaaaaaand your point is?

**Kid Flash:** THE POINT IS YOU NEVER KNEW WE WERE KIDNAPPED!

**Impulse:** What? Pssh, I totally knew that we… Wait… Oh, yep, never mind. Turns out I didn't know we were kidnapped.

(Everyone counts down silently from 3.)

**Impulse:** HOLY FIZZBITCH! WE WERE KIDNAPPED? WHEN? HOW? WHAT? Uuuuuugh, we are so MODED!

**Nightwing:** Alright, enough with the moding and stuff. Tim, since you found the note, you'll read off the list.

**Robin:** Uh, okay. Er, the next person up is…you, Dick.

**Nightwing:** What? Aw, man!

**Robin:** You have to sing Bitter End by Veer Union.

**Nightwing:** Well, at least it's not that bad a song.

_Oh,__  
>My mind is clear, I have no fear,<em>_  
>Cuz now I know the other side of me,<em>_  
>I'm letting go of who I used to be.<br>Now I'm alive, feeling born again,__  
>And I will fight until the bitter end.<em>__

_Took a thousand scars to find me,__  
>Every one of them reminds me,<em>__

_I won't ever surrender like that.__  
>I know better, to ever fall back.<em>_  
>The enemy was living in my head,<em>_  
>I ripped it out and left it there for dead.<em>_  
>Now I'm alive I'm feeling born again,<em>_  
>And I will fight until the bitter end.<em>__

_I found my way through jaded days,__  
>Cuz now I know the other side of me,<em>_  
>I'm letting go of who I used to be.<em>_  
>Now I'm alive I'm feeling born again,<em>_  
>And I will fight until the bitter end.<em>__

_Took a thousand scars to find me,__  
>And every one of them remind me,<em>_  
><em>_[ Lyrics from: lyrics/t/the_veer_union/bitter_ ]__  
>I won't ever surrender like that,<em>_  
>I know better to ever fall back.<em>_  
>The enemy was living in my head,<em>_  
>I ripped it out and left it there for dead.<em>_  
>Now I'm alive I'm feeling born again,<em>_  
>And I will fight until the bitter end.<em>_  
>Bitter end.<em>__

_My mind is clear, I have no fear,__  
>It took a thousand scars to find me,<em>_  
>Memories remain.<em>__

_I won't ever surrender like that,__  
>I know better to ever fall back.<em>_  
>The enemy was living in my head,<em>_  
>I ripped it out and left it there for dead.<em>_  
>Now I'm alive I'm feeling born again,<em>_  
>And I will fight until the bitter end.<em>__

_I won't ever surrender like that,__  
>And I know better to ever fall back.<em>_  
>The enemy was living in my head,<em>_  
>I ripped it out and left it there for dead.<em>_  
>Now I'm alive I'm feeling born again,<em>_  
>And I will fight until the bitter end.<em>_  
>Bitter end.<em>

How was that?

**Batgirl:** Descriptive. I _like_ it. *Walks up to Nightwing and kisses him.*

**Bumblebee:** Oh-kay, Babs, That's real cute and all, but could y'all do that another time?

**Red Arrow:** Yeah Dick. *Holds up Lian* There are small, innocent children in the room. And an Atlantean that is totally ignorant about sex.

(Cue a not-so-masculine sounding horrified scream coming from the back room.)

**Miss Martian:** La'gaan?

**Red Arrow:** And forget that last comment.

**Robin:** Okay, will you all just shut up and let me do my job?

(Total. Silence.)

**Nightwing:** *Gawking.* Oh. My. God.

**Robin:** What?

**Nightwing:** *fake sniffles.* You've done it kid. You've finally broken out of your little "perfect vocabulary" safety bubble. *fake sniffles.* I'm so proud of you.

**Robin:** Yeah. Ha ha. Really funny. Next up is…Wonder Woman.

**Wonder Girl:** You mean me? That's very flattering, Tim, but I-

**Robin:** Uh, I'm sorry Cass, but I was talking about_ the_ Wonder Woman. Diana Prince?

**Wonder Girl:** *Blushing.* Oh. Um, right. Sorry.

**Wonder Woman:** What is that madman making me sing?

**Robin:** Well, you have to sing Broken Pieces by Apocalyptica to Batman.

**Wonder Woman:** Simple enough.

_Too late, this is not the answer  
>I need to pack it in<br>I can't pull your heart together,__  
>With just my voice alone.<em>

_A thousand shards of glass,__  
>I came to meet you and,<em>_  
>And you cut the piece out of me.<em>

_And as you ripped it all apart  
>That's when I turned to watch you.<br>And as the light in you went dark  
>I saw you turn to shadow<em>

_If you would salvage some part of you  
>That once knew love<br>But I'm losing this  
>And I'm losing you<em>

_Oh, I've gotta turn and run  
>From faces that you never see<br>Oh I've gotta save my blood  
>From all that you've broken<br>I hold these pieces of me  
><em>_[ Lyrics from: lyrics/a/apocalyptica/broken_ ]__  
>It's too late now<br>To stop the process  
>This was your choice<br>You let it in  
>This double life you lead<br>Is eating you up from within  
>A thousand shards of glass<br>You pushed beneath my skin  
>Left me lying there to bleed<em>

_And as you showed me your scars__  
>I only held you closer<br>But as the light in you went dark  
>I saw you turn over<br>I wanted always to be there for you and close to you  
>But I'm losing this<br>And I'm losing you_

_Oh, I've gotta turn and run  
>From faces that you never see<br>Oh I've gotta save my blood  
>From all that you've broken<br>I hold these pieces of me_

_The broken pieces  
>I hold these pieces of me<br>The broken pieces  
>I hold these pieces<em>

_Maybe without me you'll return  
>All the beauty I once knew<br>But if I stay I know  
>We will both be drowned by your holding onto me<em>

_Oh, I've gotta turn and run  
>From faces that you never see<br>Oh I've gotta save my blood  
>From all that you've broken<br>I hold these pieces of me_

_The broken pieces  
>I hold these pieces of me<br>The broken pieces  
>I hold these pieces of me<br>_

**Batman:** Wow. That was-

**Robin:** Sorry bats, but I've got a show to run. Up next is Artemis singing Promises by Nero.

**Artemis:** Wow. Uh, okay. That was blunt.

_You got me so wild  
>How can I ever deny?<br>You got me so high  
>So high I cannot feel the fire<br>And you keep telling me  
>Telling me that you'll be sweet<br>And you'll never want to leave my side__  
>As long as I don't break these<em>

_Promises  
>And they still feel all so wasted on myself<br>Promises  
>And they still feel all so wasted on myself<br>Promises  
>And they still feel all so wasted on myself<br>Promises  
>And they still feel all so wasted on myself<br>__[ Lyrics from: . ]__  
>You got me so wild<br>Why should I be so surprised?  
>You got me so high<br>Don't you see it in my eyes?  
>And you keep telling me<br>Telling me that you'll be sweet  
>And you'll never want to leave my side<br>As long as I don't break these_

_Promises  
>And they still feel all so wasted on myself<br>Promises  
>And they still feel all so wasted on myself<br>Promises  
>And they still feel all so wasted on myself<br>Promises  
>And they still feel all so wasted on myself<em>

_They are so wasted on myself_

_They are so wasted on myself_

_They are so wasted on myself_

_They are so wasted on myself_

_They are so wasted on myself_

_They are so wasted on myself_

_They are so wasted on myself_

_They are so wasted on myself_

_They are so wasted on myself_

_They are so wasted on myself_

_They are so wasted on myself_

_They are so wasted on myself_

_They are so wasted on myself_

_Promises  
>And they still feel all so wasted on myself<br>Promises  
>And they still feel all so wasted on myself<br>Promises  
>And they still feel all so wasted on myself<br>Promises  
>And they still feel all so wasted on myself<br>_

**Kid Flash:** Beautiful. Simply marvelous, Babe.

(Artemis blushes slightly.)

**Robin:** Sorry to cut in but-

**Artemis:** Jeez, will you knock it off with that whole "Show to run" crap?

**Robin:** Sorry. But seriously. Next up is you again Dick. But this time you're signing us off with AC/DC's Shoot to Thrill.

**Nightwing:** Aw, Hell yeah!

_All you women who want a man of the street  
>But you don't know which way you wanna turn<br>Just keep a coming and put your hand out to me  
>'Cause I'm the one who's gonna make you burn<em>

_I'm gonna take you down - down, down, down  
>So don't you fool around<br>I'm gonna pull it, pull it, pull the trigger_

_Shoot to thrill, play to kill__  
>Too many women with too many pills<br>Shoot to thrill, play to kill  
>I got my gun at the ready, gonna fire at will<br>Yeah_

_I'm like evil, I get under your skin  
>Just like a bomb that's ready to blow<br>'Cause I'm illegal, I got everything  
>That all you women might need to know<em>

_I'm gonna take you down - yeah, down, down, down  
>So don't you fool around<br>I'm gonna pull it, pull it, pull the trigger_

_Shoot to thrill, play to kill  
>Too many women with too many pills<br>Shoot to thrill, play to kill  
>I got my gun at the ready, gonna fire at will<br>'Cause I shoot to thrill, and I'm ready to kill  
>I can't get enough, I can't get the thrill<br>I shoot to thrill, play to kill  
>Yeah, pull the trigger<br>Pull it, pull it, pull it, pull the trigger_

_Oh_

_Shoot to thrill, play to kill  
>Too many women, with too many pills<br>I said, shoot to thrill, play to kill  
>I got my gun at the ready, gonna fire at will<br>'Cause I shoot to thrill, and I'm ready to kill  
>And I can't get enough, and I can't get my thrill<br>'Cause I shoot to thrill, play it again  
>Yeah<br>Shoot you down  
>Yeah<br>I'm gonna get you to the bottom and shoot you  
>I'm gonna shoot you<br>Oh hoo yeah yeah yeah  
>I'm gonna shoot you down yeah yeah<br>I'm gonna get you down  
>Yeah yeah yeah yeah<br>Shoot you, shoot you, shoot you, shoot you down  
>Shoot you, shoot you, shoot you down<br>Oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, ooooooh  
>I'm gonna shoot to thrill<br>Play to kill  
>Shoot to thrill<br>Yeah, ooh yeah  
><em>

**Robin:** Well, that's all folks. Now go home. I'm not kidding, fuck off. And leave comments while you're at it. Comments with suggestions. Seeya!


	7. Chapter 7

**Author's Note:** Hey everybody! I'm so, so sorry about the extreme delay. Check this out, I find that it's been really annoying to type the title and chapter on every upload, so I'm changing my game around a little. I hope you guys like the new, briefer chapter introduction.

**Disclaimer:** Disclaimed. Simple as that.

**Me:** Hey everybody! I'm baaaack! Did you guys behave while I was gone?

**Batgirl:** Where the HELL were you?

**Me:** Out with my friends. Didn't you find the note?

**Wonder Girl:** OH. We found that note, alright. But we ended up having to tie up and gag poor Timmy over there.

**Me:** YOU DID WHAT?! WHY?!

**Bumblebee:** Sorry, but he was taking his little "job" way too seriously.

**Me:** (Not listening and mumbling to self.) Shit, shit, shit! Eve is gonna be sooooo fucking PISSED at me… Hell, not to mention Selene… And Michael's just gonna rip me in two…

**Artemis:** Hey…HEY! We're talking to you! now who are these people you're babbling about? And what did you do to make them wanna rip you in two?

**Me:** Oh, hehe… They're… different… to say the least. They're, uh, nothing special.

(Artemis raises her eyebrow skeptically.)

**Me:** Anyhow, on with the show! Starting with Blue Beetle.

**Blue Beetle:** Ah, shit.

**Me:** Oh, don't be such a sourpuss. You're singing Do What You Want by Ok Go. Now, ok, go.

**Blue Beetle:** Ha. Very funny.

_So you were born in an electrical storm_

_Took a bite out the sun_

_And saw your future in a machine built for two_

___Now your rays make me kind of go crazy_

_Shock and awe and amaze me_

_Just a ticker tape parade and me_

___But something was wrong_

_Till you tap danced on the air, in the night_

_Screaming at the top of your lungs, you said_

___"Come on, come on_

_Do what you want_

_What could go wrong?_

_Oh, come on, come on, come on"__  
><em>_"Come on_

_Do what you want_

_Oh, come on, come on_

_What could go wrong?_

_Do, do, do, do what you want, yeah_

_Come on[Incomprehensible]"_

___Me, I was raised amid the trickle-down days_

_I woke up numb in the haze_

_And saw my future in a machine built for two_

___But the light gave me some kind of fright_

_How did wrong get so right_

_And lead me stumbling through the dark of night?_

___Oh, something was wrong_

_But you tap danced on the air, in the night_

_Screaming at the top of your lungs, you said_

___"Come on, come on_

_Do what you want_

_What could go wrong?_

_Oh, come on, come on, come on"__  
><em>_"Come on_

_Do what you want_

_Oh, come on, come on_

_What could go wrong?_

_Do, do, do, do what you want, yeah[Incomprehensible]"_

___Do, do, do, do what you want_

_Do, do, do, do what you want, yeah_

___Come on_

_Come on_

_Come on__  
><em>_Do, do, do, do what you want, yeah_

_Do, do, do, do what you want, yeah_

_Do what you want_

_Do what you want__  
><em>_Do what you want_

_Do, do what you want_

_Do, do what you want_

_Do, do what you want_

_Do, do, do what you want__  
><em>_Come on, come on_

_Come on, come on_

_Do, do, do, do, do, do, do, do what you want, yeah_

_Do, do, yeah_

**Me:** Now, I don't know about you guys, but that song only fortified my belief that mister Reyes here is a drug addict.

**Beast Boy:** Uh, why would you think that?

**Me:** Uh, simple: One, he's a little too slow for his age…

**Blue Beetle:** Hey!

**Me:** Shut up you! Two, he talks to himself…

**Blue Beetle:** It's just me communicating with the Scarab's AI!

**Me:** Suuuuuure. Just keep telling yourself that. Or, don't. Whichever one's better for your mental health. And finally, When he's in his armor, his eyes turn red in the irises and yellow where there should be white. (**A/N:** Seriously you guys, am I the only person to realize this?) Now onwards.

Our next singer is, drum-roll please…(Pause, silence) Drum-roll please…(Pause, silence) God damn it, give me a fucking drum-roll!

(Drum-roll)

**Me:** Thank you. Anyway, our next singer is… or should I say are all female members of the league and the team. Featuring Zatanna as lead vocalist.

(Collective feminine groan.)

**Me:** Oh, don't complain. I'm doing an extra special one after this so just hurry up and sing American Boys by Halestorm (A/N: I don't know about you guys, but if you look up the song on YouTube, I could definitely picture Zatanna with Lizzy Hale's singing voice.). GO!

**Zatanna:**

_Friday night boys and their PBR,_

_Chasing Jack, getting wrecked in small town bars._

_Big City Roller in NYC_

_You're a sharp dressed man just like ZZ._

_Harley riding biker in a leather jacket._

_I like ridin' bitch, oh, sitting on the back, yeah._

_Pretty boys at the university_

_Watching them walk in their Levi jeans._

**Female Vocals:**

_Yeah, Yeah _

**Zatanna:**

_Can't help but fall,_

**Female Vocals:**

_Yeah, yeah, _

**Zatanna:**

_God bless 'em all._

_American boys_

_Gotta love 'em, god i need 'em, god i want 'em_

_They're my drug of choice,_

_Yeah, yeah, yeah_

_American boys_

_Wanna slay 'em, wanna lay 'em, wanna play 'em_

_They're my favorite toys,_

_American, American boys._

_Metal head boys in the back of a Camaro,_

_Bangin' to Metallica on the radio._

_From an all-star stud, to a punk like you_

_We got to many flavors that i just can't choose._

**Female Vocals:**

_Yeah, yeah _

**Zatanna:**

_they rock the world_

**Female Vocals:**

_Yeah, yeah_

**Zatanna:**

_of this American girl_

_American boys, _

_gotta love 'em god i need 'em, god i want 'em_

_They're my drug of choice,_

_yeah, yeah, yeah_

_American boys,_

_wanna slay 'em, wanna lay 'em, wanna play 'em_

_They're my favorite toys_

_American, American boys_

_I've been everywhere and nothing compares_

**Female Vocals:**

_American boys_

**Zatanna:**

_Nothing like 'em, rock me like a_

**Female Vocals:**

_American boy_

**Zatanna:**

_Come on make your move...do what you do_

_American boys, _

_gotta love 'em god i need 'em, god i want 'em_

_They're my drug of choice,_

_yeah, yeah, yeah_

_American boys,_

_wanna slay 'em, wanna lay 'em, wanna play 'em_

_They're my favorite toys_

_American boys_

_American boys, _

_gotta love 'em god i need 'em, god i want 'em_

_They're my favorite toys_

_Yeah, yeah, yeah, _

_yeah, American boys, _

_wanna slay 'em, wanna lay 'em, wanna play 'em_

_They're my favorite toys_

_American, American boys._

**Me:** Beautifully done, ladies, Bravissime. Now, our next singer is actually one I should've done a while ago. This one is a very famous classic. I doubt that anyone hasn't heard of it.

**Miss Martian:** Well? What is it?

**Me:** It's funny you should ask since, you know, you modeled your human persona after one of the extras in the movie this song is from. (A/N: Just pretend Garfield's mom was an extra in Top Gun.)

**Miss Martian:** That still doesn't tell us much.

**Me:** I know. Isn't it just infuriating?

**Superboy:** JUST GET TO THE FUCKING POINT!

**Me:** Heeey! I yelled the exact same thing when I started reading The Scarlet Letter!

**Wally:** Good God, that book was awful.

**Me:** It still is, Wally. It still is. Anyway, you, Wally, and once again you, Dick, are going to sing Great Balls of Fire by Jerry Lewis in the style of Maverick and Goose from Top Gun! Now DO IT!

**Dick:** Well, Wally…

**Wally:** Yeah, Dick?

**Dick:** I just gotta say one thing before we do this.

**Wally:** What's that, buddy?

**Dick:** I feel the need…

**Dick & Wally:** THE NEED FOR SPEED. *CLAP, CLAP* (High and low five. [A/N:Like Maverick and Goose.]) OW!

(Upbeat Piano Music.)

**Dick:**

_You shake my nerves and you rattle my brain._

**Wally:**

___Too much love drives a man insane_

**Dick:**

___You broke my will_

**Wally:**

___But what a thrill_

**Dick & Wally:**

___Goodness gracious great balls of fire!_

**Dick:**__

_I laughed at love cause I thought it was funny__  
><em>_but you came along and moooooved me honey_

**Wally:**

___I've changed my mind__  
><em>_This love is fine_

**Dick & Wally:**

___Goodness gracious great balls of fire!_

**Dick:**__

_Kiss me baby__  
><em>_Mmmm feels good_

**Wally:**

___Hold me baby__  
><em>_Welll I want to love you like a lover should_

**Dick & Wally:**

___You're fine, so kind__  
><em>_Got to tell this world that you're mine mine mine mine_

**Dick:**__

_I chew my nails and I twiddle my thumbs_

**Wally:**

___I'm real nervous but it sure is fun_

**Dick:**

___C'mon baby, _

**Wally:**

_you drive me crazy_

**Dick & Wally:**

___Goodness gracious great balls of fire!___

**Dick:**__

_Welll, kiss me baby__  
><em>_Mmmm feels good_

**Wally:**

___Hold me baby__  
><em>_Welll I want to love you like a lover should_

**Dick & Wally:**

___You're fine, so kind__  
><em>_Got to tell this world that you're mine mine mine mine_

**Dick:**__

_I chew my nails and I twiddle my thumbs_

**Wally:**

___I'm real nervous but it sure is fun_

**Dick:**

___C'mon baby, _

**Wally:**

_you drive me crazy_

**Dick & Wally:**

___Goodness gracious great balls of fire!_

**Me:** That's what I'm talkin' about! Good to see some Bro Action between you two. Especially after what happened with-

**Dick:** DON'T, don't talk about her.

**Me:** But wh- you know what? I'm not even gonna ask. This next one's a little weird, but I'm hoping you guys will get it. I saw this song on a request, but the person deleted their account soon after. I, however, thought it was PERFECT.

**Jade:** Ah, shit. I pity the poor bastard who's going next.

**Me:** Now, singing Gentleman by Theory of a Deadman, please welcome SPORTSMASTER!

**Jade:** And suddenly, I don't pity him anymore.

**Sportsmaster:** Shut up, little girl. Soon enough, You'll see what it's really like to be where I am.

_I'll let the door, hit you right in the face__  
><em>_And when the check comes, I'll make ya pay__  
><em>_Don't have a car, I guess you're picking me up__  
><em>_And in the backseat, we'll be falling in love__  
><em>_My only job is, to lie on this couch__  
><em>_And while you're working, I'll be hanging out__  
><em>_Now don't get mad 'cause, you knew from the start__  
><em>_I was an asshole who would never go far___

_'Cause when you're really good to girls__  
><em>_Give them their entire world__  
><em>_They end up walking away, hey hey__  
><em>_They don't want a stand up guy__  
><em>_They'd rather have you cheat and lie__  
><em>_And do something they hate___

_Girls don't want a gentleman__  
><em>_They say they do but in the end__  
><em>_Girls don't want a gentleman__  
><em>_They want a loser like me__  
><em>_Girls don't want a gentleman__  
><em>_If you want to get to them__  
><em>_Girls don't want a gentleman__  
><em>_They want a loser like me___

_Your parents cry__  
><em>_When you bring me around__  
><em>_They raised you up__  
><em>_Just so I could take you down__  
><em>_There goes your life__  
><em>_Right before their eyes__  
><em>_I'll have ya barefoot, pregnant, going out of your mind__  
><em>_'Cause when you're really good to girls__  
><em>_Give them their entire world__  
><em>_They end up walking away, hey hey__  
><em>_They don't want a stand up guy__  
><em>_They'd rather have you cheat and lie__  
><em>_And do something they hate___

_Girls don't want a gentleman__  
><em>_They say they do but in the end__  
><em>_Girls don't want a gentleman__  
><em>_They want a loser like me__  
><em>_Girls don't want a gentleman__  
><em>_If you want to get to them__  
><em>_Girls don't want a gentleman__  
><em>_They want a loser like me___

_I used to be a nice guy__  
><em>_But that don't get you anywhere__  
><em>_So no one cares__  
><em>_You piece of shit, idiot__  
><em>_Who's to stupid to care___

_When you give a girl respect__  
><em>_Treat her like she is the best__  
><em>_You're nothing to her__  
><em>_She'd rather have you playing games__  
><em>_Piss her off and make her wait__  
><em>_If you want to do her___

_Girls don't want a gentleman__  
><em>_They say they do but in the end__  
><em>_Girls don't want a gentleman__  
><em>_They want a loser like me__  
><em>_Girls don't want a gentleman__  
><em>_If you want to get to them__  
><em>_Girls don't want a gentleman__  
><em>_They want a loser like me___

_Girls don't want a gentleman__  
><em>_They say they do but in the end__  
><em>_Girls don't want a gentleman__  
><em>_They want a loser like me__  
><em>_Girls don't want a gentleman__  
><em>_If you want to get to them__  
><em>_Girls don't want a gentleman___

_They want a loser like me__  
><em>_They want a loser like me__  
><em>_They want a loser like me_

(Complete and total silence)

**Sportsmaster:** What! I couldn't have been THAT bad.

**Me:**Dude, I just realized…

**Sportsmaster:** What!

**Me:** …That song… describes you PERFECTLY!

**Sportsmaster:** (Face turns crimson, complete with a tiny vein on his forehead bulging out. Attempts to kill Me.)

**Me:** (Holds a Hammerli 280 pistol to his forehead. Says in a low-toned, hostile voice.) I wouldn't do that if I were you.

**Sportsmaster:** (Backs off, hands in surrender position.)

**Captain Marvel:** Okay, whoa. What's with the gun?

**Red Hood:** It's a Hammerli Model 280 chambered in either .22 long rifle or .32 Smith & Wesson long.

**Me:** Nice to see you there, Hoodster. It's in .22 long rifle. This way the rounds are easier to get en masse. And I keep it with me specifically for guys like him. (Gestures at Sportsmaster.)

**Red Hood:** Okay, first of all, don't EVER call me "Hoodster" again. Second, if you had a definite choice, what sort of gun would you carry?

**Me:** Ugh. I'm in between a Walther PPK/S and a Springfield Armory TRP Operator light rail.

**Red Hood:** Not bad, not bad. But my custom Silver Ghosts could beat either of those any day.

**Wonder Girl:** Hey, uh, Red Hood? Me kinda has to finish up with us, if you don't mind.

**Me:** Oh, that's right. Thanks Cass. And now-

**Via:** Jay? Jay, you down here?

**Me:** Oh crap, that's right! I was supposed to meet up with Via, Letty, Ari, and Alli for the Oedipus Rex project. (raising voice slightly) Uh, yeah, I'm here. You can come on in.

(Enter four teenage girls)

**Alli:** What the fuck?

**Letty:** Oh, uh…

**Ari:** Who…?

**Via:** HEY! Wait a second! (walks up to Connor and points at his face) You're Superboy! (Walks up to Dick and points at his ass) And you are most DEFINITELY Nightwing. (Whirls around) Jay…

**Me:** Hehe, yes?

**Via:** Start Talking.

**Author's Note:** Gah, I know that these things are annoying. I just want to point out that I am very, EXTREMELY pleased with the reception that this story has gotten. I'm sorry I didn't get to my 6-song Quota, but times have been tough. Falling in and out of love is messy business. Anyway, I hope to have another chapter out VERY soon just to make up for this one not living up to expectations. You guys know the drill! See ya next time.


End file.
